Here's A Brilliant Tip

Do not dice jalepenos for pico de gallo in the morning and then forget to wash your hands and jump in the shower cause you're gross from your first workout in more days than you'd like to admit.
Do not massage a cream cleanser onto your eyes to remove the eyeliner you slept and exercised in. 


Because...washing your face first thing in the shower after you have diced jalepenos and forgotten to wash your hands... will hurt. 


YOUR EYES. Hurt your moron eyes. 


Unrelated:
I've had the privilege to meet and get to know several of my friends' grandparents. They have all greatly influenced my opinion of 'the senior set' in a positive and affectionate way. 
As the years go by, we all lose these people. Losing a grandparent can run the gamut of emotions or you can feel isolated from the loss if you were not close. I have seen several friends whose grandparents have passed; most recently my friend Jones'. 
I knew her slightly more than in passing. Jones lived in her basement and passing through the basement door was like exiting a Mad Men set and entering a punk dive bar populated with drunks, poets and crazies. You would encounter Grandma if you went up to pee (which I did frequently) or if Jones didn't hear you knocking at the back or the window. 
She was just a sweet woman. That's the best word I can think of to describe her. She always remembered who I was when I called the house and chatted with me on many occasions. 
My husband and I both wish there had been a service for her. We would have liked to pay respects, but to also be there for our friend. 
But there wasn't and we couldn't...so...

Grandma Florence Rudy...you are missed.