Warning:may be sports-related...

Hey there...hey. Hi. How are ya? Ooooookaey...word. 

Above is a phrase I said many, many, MANY times yesterday. That, or something like it. 

I was very much looking forward to work yesterday, for a number of reasons. One being the opportunity to use it as a little anthropological study on mall patrons.

"Well, WHY?!" , you ask. 

More reasons. To keep myself entertained. Because there was a big-ass football game in Chicago yesterday and I was interested in seeing who would be shopping during it. 

The results are in:

-Moms and daughters. Most of the moms didn't want to talk to me. That is okay. We have other people for them to talk to. 

-Sisters. They were more willing to work with me. That's usually better because then I can get them to buy more things. 

-Pretty sure there were a total of like FIVE men that came in during my shift (which began at the same time the game did). Two memorable (presumably hetero) gentlemen were the one in the 70s shearling jacket and the REALLY REALLY SAD LOOKING guy with the Cutler jersey on. They both made me smile because the jacket was SO VERY 70s and so very...patched...it was...like...something my dad would have worn. (if you know my family, I want you to pause for a moment here and re-read my literary/comic genius in the previous few sentences. You are welcome.)

And Mr. Cutler jersey man...he really did look sad. One of my coworkers basically dragged him into the store to ask him about the game. I sort of wanted to give him a hug. I don't pity sports fans when their team loses. I'm truly as empathetic as possible. Probably because Mr. Smith can get sad when the Bears lose. And I love Mr. Smith. 

However...IT IS JUST FOOTBALL

Did I piss you off right there? Sorry. But it is. I'm not gonna be  a JERK about it. I AM sorry the Bears lost. I LIKE watching football. 

So this isn't entirely about myself or football, please go look at this post on Prada, strippers, and Andre Leon Talley's opinion on the state of American culture. 
And please go read this post in order to drool over the photographs. Plus, the author is inspiring. 

Mind Body Connection, and TANGENT TIME!!!

First off, let it be said that I feel like a Hebrew slave. That was meant as a joke, not any sort of religious or racial bashing. Haha, get it...there's a Pharaoh...and then there's me...oh weeehooohahahaaa. 
Right then. 


I've been stupidly too exhausted to work out for the past 2 weeks. It shames me to admit this. Inherent laziness is a part of me; I fight it constantly. 
I cannot avoid the connection between that and the fact that I feel like ass. Achy. Tired. Bloated. Out of touch. 


That being said; and me having been up now since 5:34 am, I am going to go do Jillian's Yoga Meltdown. 
Sun salutations make me emotional. You should try it. Do at least 2 in a row, quickly. Good stuff. That and the Warrior pose will help me feel like a well-working machine again. God didn't give us all these damn muscles to sit around. 


Tangent Time!!!
Although I suppose this entire blog is a tangent in one way or another. 
So, I admit this: I watch the Real Housewives shows. When I can, which is usually the day of the finale, when Bravo reruns the entire season. 
Last night I got to see the RH of D.C. finale (which is NOT to be confused with the REUNION SHOW, which is totes NOT the same), and it was PRETTY GOOD!
I really like Cat-she's got the balls I wish I had. The Salahis or WHOEVER THE fuck THEY ARE ...are like the weirdest people ever. That woman is a robot. 




One last thing: Lush has fragrances. Perfumes. Fragrances...?Perfumes. Perfumes. 
Run, do not walk, to your nearest store and find one for yourself.  I think I found mine, and it is NOT the one I thought. 

This has filled a void in my life that I didn't know existed:

Music and Musings

I cannot stop listening to this song-thank you very much Elizabeth...






The husb does NOT like it, heh heh. He called it 'spacey girl music'.
Yeah, man. YEAH. 


So...worky work work...last night it was CUH-RAY-ZEE slow. As anyone who works in a service industry will tell you, slow nights suck hard. They go slllllowllllly and you don't make any monies. 
I was standing in the doorway of our shop handing out free samples.
This is interesting on a number of levels. There are the people who look right through me and walk away. There are the people who look at me, look at my shop sign, and shake their head; refusing the sample. Because, you know...WHO THE HECK WANTS A FREE SAMPLE FROM A NATURAL HANDMADE COSMETIC STORE?????? YUCKY!!!!!!
Then there are the folks who were looking for a reason to come in. The people who shake your hand and genuinely thank you for talking to them and introducing them to the products. 
I like those people better. But I wish they would BUY SOMETHING, because they usually don't. Booo. 


Working on finishing some sewing projects and will post photos of them soon. I am crossing my fingers that I win some ruffle fabric from Katy at No Big Dill. There's a skirt I REALLY want to make, and the fabric is a little pricey.


I am really liking the color palette I see for fall, and I wish I had a disposable income to buy cute clothes!!
*guess what I am asking Santa for...* 


I am freakin HUNGRY!!!!!! Spring rolls for dinner do NOT keep you full very long. 
Milo and I have a playdate today with two of our favorite girls. EXCITING!!!!!!!!

Self Improvesies

I may have found the cure to my hair A.D.D.(period).
InStyle.com has this makeover thingamajigger that I spent WAAAAAY too much time on yesterday.

Please to be ignoring the weird bit of hair sticking out of my head there. This is Posh's old bob, darkened, with Angelina's makeup from somethingsomething.

Pink blush! Who knew????

STRANGELY enough...Rihanna's hairdos ALL looked pretty good on me. 

But I doubt I will be doing the cockatiel thing anytime soon.

OR WILL I?????

Grow hair, grow!!!!

I also apparently need black liquid eyeliner every day of my life.

On the reals, though...I can't seem to shake these last 5 to 7 pounds. I get all snacky at the end of the day which is THE WORSTEST time to snack. Doubleyouteeeff.

I'll have to eventually resort to duct tape over the old mouthahontas. Stupid willpower and me not having any. Boo. 

Um...also...Amanda Palmer has recently put out an album of Radiohead covers. ON HER UKELELE. 

I want. Badly. 

http://music.amandapalmer.net/album/amanda-palmer-performs-the-popular-hits-of-radiohead-on-her-magical-ukulele

Go. Now. Listen. 

Screamy-good.  

Last night at work, I couldn't sell a DAMN thang...I had enthusiastic customers, I demoed my face off, and still...no one bought. Even the woman who wanted our most expensive moisturizer, and the one who was pissed off at Oak Brook for lying to her (sorry to trash another store, but y'all gave that lady WORNG INFO). I was trying SO HARD to impress my new bosslady-who has purple hair and a Vonnegut quote tattoo (swoon). 

But then. THEN. Another co-worker paid me the SWEETEST compliment. She said that the first time she met me she thought I looked like a 50s pinup girl. 

I almost made out with her right there. Not really, but I DID give her a big hug. Planning to file that one away for my less-than-loving-myself moments. 

Time to go sweat to the oldies. Kidding. Jillian and I are hanging out again. She's got a big butt. 

Promises, promises

I have a new boss at work. I met her for the first time on Sunday evening, and she seems really cool.She has/wants purple hair.  Tonight will be my first time working with her. 
Last night I dreamt we got into a fist fight at work. 
What the fuck?
Last night was a WEIRD night for me. Custies were bizarre and I kept hearing of massively life-changing personal events (for other people, not me). 
Weird. 
Anyways, I promised cute pics of Milo flossing.
Et voila:

I heart iPhoto

This is probably going to be my last post until Monday, as this will be a crazy wedding weekend!!!


I'll be flying around doing random things like:


Making this:

It is called Texas Caviar or something like that. Its basically canned, rinsed black beans and chickpeas with chopped celery, bell pepper, onion, cilantro and a can of corn. Oh, and 8 oz of Italian dressing. I thought that was a bit much, but this is supposed to chill overnight. I made it early this morning and won't be serving it until 6 or 7 tonight, so I think we'll be fine. It is meant to be eaten as a dip with tortilla chips. I'm bringing it to my future sister-in-law's house for Megan and Justin's rehearsal dinner. 

Wait. She's Justin's sister. Justin is marrying MY sister. I don't know if that makes Justin's sister anything to me. 

I don't know. I don't even think I pluralized that correctly. Ah well.

Doing this:

Catastrophe Cosmetic mask from Lush.It has blueberries in it and smells divine. I love iPhoto because I had a blueberry under my nose in this photo and it looked like a booger. But I edited it out! Sweet!  I actually did this one yesterday. I'll do Ayesha tonight with my sisters. 

And maybe letting Milo finish watching Harry Potter:

He very much likes the train to Hogwarts, and the Enchanted Car. I hope we can read the books together when he's older. I tried to get into the books in order to understand the movies, but it never really happened. I do think whatserface is a pretty good storyteller, though. And I am happy she is now a gazillionbrazillionpraskillionaire. 

I like how he has his feet kicked up behind him in this one. 

Have a great weekend to the two (three?) people who read this~~~pray for good weather on Saturday!!!!