Thursday, January 28, 2010

Resolutions, Schmesolutions

When I think of resolutions, I think of unattainable goals. Or ones that are rooted in selfishness. I don't think I have ever once done something that I resolved to do.
So, for the year of two thousand ten, I will make some GOALS (NOT resolutions) for myself, and hopefully this blog will keep me accountable. I say hopefully, because I suck royally at follow-through. I start , but I do not finish. I saw an interview with Lady Gaga (of all people) and her words were inspiring. She talked about 'being a finisher'; and as I watched this tiny woman in a Gaultier (maybe?) dress with a crazy wig speak, I realized that I am SO not a finisher. And I really want to be one.
So-thanks, Gaga. You're a brilliant woman and an inspiration to many. Here is my list of things I'd like to accomplish this year...forgive the random nature of it and the personal explanations of WHY they are here.

-complete a craft project LIKE:
the embroidered pillow for my mother
a rag rug
a crazy log cabin quilt block (just a block, I am not going to overwhelm myself with attempting an entire QUILT)

-really try to adjust my self-image and learn to love the skin I am in. This is not a result of a negative upbringing-my parents ALWAYS told me I was smart, and beautiful and worthy. It was truly one of the very greatest things they did for me (choking up here-thanks mom and dad!). BUT. For some terrible, awful, Satanic (yeah, I said it) reason...I am disgusted with myself. Daily. A lot of it has to do with gaining WAY too much weight while pregnant, and some of it has to do with a (lame and shameful) need to be told I'm pretty. So yeah-I'll work on that one-haha.

-focus on the needs of my husband. The relationship between a husband and wife needs to be rock solid, and it takes work. And I am willing to do that work. I am also willing to challenge my DH to do that work too. I refuse to become a statistic.

-stay in better touch with my friends. A number of them have become family to me, and I know that sometimes I neglect those relationships. You know who you are, and I love you to death.

-in that same focus on my immediate family. I don't spend as much time with them as I should, and I want to be a better daughter and sister.

-to be grateful for my life, every single day. Being a SAHM is tough. It is lonely, repetitive, messy and sometimes insanely boring. But it is also magical, special, and the VERY most rewarding thing I have EVER done. I am so very lucky that my husband has a job that allows me to stay home and make it a welcoming place that he and the Goo want to be .

-to be the best mom to the Goo that he could ever have.

-and read through the Bible in its entirety. I have a lesson plan to read through it chronologically and I am coming along pretty well. (even through the boring parts. I hope that isn't blasphemous but DANG is the book of Job BORING. Sorry Job. I know you had a tough time. Don't take it personally.)

And there we have it. Hopefully this will keep me accountable. I can come back here and update things and let everyone and myself know how I am doing. Here's an old photo of the Goo and I. I like it because we both look supercool and we're smiling. AH, motherhood.


  1. love the smiling pic.

    while it is important to finish (and the goals here noted are worthy of finishing) dont be too hard on yourself. Not everyone is a finisher by design. The important thing is to work alongside someone who is naturally a finisher. You start, you inspire, you energize, and you learn when to let someone else tie it all up and call it done.

    This has been a hard lesson for me. In some places I thrive on finishing and others. . .eh, not so much. So I work on acknowledging where I am strong, building on my strengths and not playing tug of war with my weaknesses. Be careful not to read too much into that though, it certainly isn't to say that weaknesses need not be addressed and worked on to some extent. But we're all put together differently and there isn't any reason to try to become a totally different model. Your model is beautifully designed to do exactly what it does.

    And here I'll stop rambling. I fear this has become my journaling for the day. Talking to me when I'm talking to you. oops.

  2. Also...please ignore my double chin.

    Jana...I agree with you-that's why I married Brian...he's got such a great work ethic and I am hoping it rubs off on me. And I am glad to be your journal anytime!!!!