Sunday, October 31, 2010


I spent yesterday morning sewing a costume for my little man. He was going as the word 'no'. In keeping with the spirit of the costume, he refused to wear it. I didn't want to press the issue
 This is what I wore Friday, until Milo threw water at me from the bathtub. Tunic from Nordstrom Rack. 
Look! Ghetto headbands can be cute when you are growing out a supershort hair cut!!!
We went to my sister's house for her annual party. 

There they are. But you can't really see them. Cause the camo...get it?
I enjoy the Milo in the background. 

Milo shoots you with a bug vaccuum. 
He went as Sue from Glee. It was all I could manage. Lamesauce, I know. Don't hate. 

Brian was the kid from E.T.

Baby sis.

Middle sis, after being 'shot' by Milo. 

She says she doesn't photograph well. I am trying to prove her wrong. 

The sisters. And our dad. Who was...a gynecologist...yeesh. 

I wanted to link to some ladies' blogs that I enjoy. Mostly because I think they are cute:

Happy Halloween to everyone. Thanks for the interweb love. Hoping I can send some back. 

Friday, October 29, 2010

Thursday Outfit On A Friday!

Yesterday was a crazy busy day, but it didn't really seem like it. 
Milo and I headed to church in the morning for my Esther study ('tis amazing, thankyouverymuchforasking), then we went to my mom's house to help her out aaaaand then we went to my ONLY BESTIE'S house for family dinner. 
So here is what I wore. Kind of trying to copy this chick, cause I think she's cool. 
Plaid shirt: thrifted, no tag inside
Tank: Old Navy
Turquoise ring: ebay
Those same damn jeans

Omgosh milo is BEGGING, 'mah hurn mah hurn' which means 'my turn' and I am NOT about to let him type on I gots to run and make a bunch of food today. 
The love from every one is cramazing. Its rather delightful to be a part of something bigger. 

Thursday, October 28, 2010

Fall Fashion a Day Late

SO, I had a heckuva day yesterday. It has been CRAZY windy the past few days here and apparently the sound of the wind whipping around the corner that is Milo's room freaks him out. 
He didn't nap yesterday. For moms with toddlers that still nap, we KNOW how blessed that hour or to can be. 
I was sitting on the floor amidst the couch cushions (Milo was using them as a slide which was YET ANOTHER ORDEAL OMGOSH) crying and feeling crappy when my phone rang.
It was my boss. 
"heeeeeeyyyy, soooooo blah de blah blah scheduling blah is there any way you could come in even a HALF hour early?"
Me: "um...well...I have to get dinner in the oven and I am not sure if blah blah husband blah blah."
Boss: "oh no, okay yeah totally do what you gotta do..this is guilt-free..."

Hah. I knew I was being tested. So I tried not to cry. Didn't work. My incredibly empathetic son gave me kisses and hugs and said, "no fry mama, no fry....happy happy!!!" (he can't do C's so well yet)

My proof that God loves me and wants me to be happy? The AMAZING customers that came into my store last night. Literally rendered me speechless. 
I will blog in detail once I figure out how to NOT lose anything in the translation from my brain to intertubes. We had: a racist concerned with natural body products, a bald Polish woman, the Hispanic family from the Jersey Shore, and the BEST COUPLE EVER. Them I am saving for last. Let's just say that they both had a name in Gothic script tattooed on their jawline. 
I LOVED IT. LOVED IT. Don't get me wrong, I am SO not judging. Just...when I think the 'burbs aren't diverse...hoho BOY. 

Whew. Here we go. Fashiony:

Orange rose ring from Patina in Minneapolis. 
Had a dream about this ring the night before. Had to wear. 

Earl straight leg jeans (pre-baby and pre-marriage size, WHUUUT)
Ann Taylor drapey v-neck from MIL
Old Navy Tank
Batik fabric headband, made by ME

Most comfortable heels EVER
The color looks weird, these are actually purple. 
I take any excuse to wear these. My small group leader last week was all, 'Those are some pretty rockin' shoes, Althea.'
I was all, 'HOLLA!'
Not really. But kind of. 

Finger gun and a fake wink. 
I cannot wink. 
Thanks to everyone for the kind words-this has been superfun. 
Although the DH was peeping the blog and he goes,
'WHY are you taking pictures of yourself???'
I'm like, 'FOR FASHION HUNNEY!!! Remember when I was stylish?'


Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Fall 'fashion'

And I use that in the loosest sense of the term. I've been slumming it the past couple days.
Sweatpants from Gap, Shirt from Target. Tampons...yeah

Running to the store
Jeans: 7 For All Mankind
Shirt: Wiffle Original!!

Pretty sweet, eh?
Necklace from Tiffany's. Probs the last piece of jewelry I'll ever get from the husb :)

This morning. Had all of about 5 hours of broken sleep last night. 
Damn storm. 
VS Pjs
Ancient Old Navy Maternity Tank
New darker hair: Sally Beauty.
Its a stay-inside-and-paint-your-toenails-and-bake-bread kinda day. Got the sourdough rising now. 

If I change into anything cool, I'll let you know. 
Oh, just a little. 

I changed for YOU!!!!
Damn my bathroom mirror is grody. 
Tunic: GoldHoax
Pink tee: Kohls, made into a cardi by moi
Jeans: Joe's Honey Cut-BEST JEANS EVER I will cry when these are irreparable

Monday, October 25, 2010


Project Runway...

Michael C did NOT TAKE IT WELL. 
Also, Tim Gunn is the best ever. 

And...tantrums...NOT the best ever. 

Monday, Monday

Bah da, bah da da....

This day intimidates me. Always has. The week and the to-do list stretches infinitely in front of me. 

Somehow, yesterday, I lost a loaf of bread AND a package of hot dog buns. 
I don't have a Halloween costume for myself or any member of my family. 
I REALLY want to try and make this at some point this week. But I do not have any wool to felt. Hah. I have a ton of jersey, so I might use that. 
I also want to make this, but I think my sewing machine has rebelled. Its older than I am, so I get it. I am asking Santa for a sewing machine tune-up. 
Now, off to find bread products and attempt to cross things off that neverending list. 

Friday, October 22, 2010

My Favorite Breakfast Ever

Toasted Deli Flat
2 scrambled egg whites
scrambled with roasted red bell peppers and Sriracha, topped with reduced fat mozzarella. 


But I am not gonna take a photo because it is SO TOTES NOT pretty. It kinda looks like bloody eggs. 
I just grossed myself out. Might have cereal this morning. 
PSYCH!!!! Cereal keeps me full for all of an hour. The above-mentioned brekkie will keep me full till lunch. 

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Good Wear Days Week One

I've been meaning to participate in some sort of 'what I wore' blah-blah, but have (till now) been far too lazy. 

It took this girl offering this bag to get me off my duff and into the bathroom (sowwy, no better place) to take some pics. I never win anything (except that gift) and she's generating a winner via, so I figure I've got a RANDOM shot at getting that supertote. 
Totes magotes. 

Boots: Frye Harness from at LEAST 9 years ago
Glasses: Zenni Optical. I'm not linking to that site until they start paying me commish. Sent plenty o biz their way. 

My favorite earrings: Nordstrom Rack 

Watch: Citizen Eco-Drive. Ebay SCORE for $30!!!
Haughty expression: genetics

Bathrobe: a gift from my grandmother-in-law three years ago. Same fabric as Milo's blankie. When I wear this I get lotsa snuggles. 
Crazy hair: braided when wet. 

Scarfy scarf: One of the first Knot Wraps from Lush
Grey Empire Waist Sweater dress: gift from MIL
There's an Old Navy tank and a pair of Target leggings in there too. 



I learned something today. 
The most frequently repeated command in the Bible is not, 'Obey, for I am the Lord.' It is not, 'Do good works and I will make you holy.'

These words resonate so strongly for me. There are so very many things to fear. So very, very many terrifying things in this Earthly world. 

And my God (yours too, if you like) tells YOU, "TAKE COURAGE". 
'There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment.' 1 John 4:18

' those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death.' Hebrews 2:15

I realize that not all the readers of this blog are Christians. But I am. And I will rest in the fact that God wants me to be brave. How I choose to act has an effect on my destiny. And I will choose to be brave. 

Today, I am grateful to be able to understand something. That the Proverbs 31 woman (and all the Christian women groaned, haha) is a woman of VALOR. Of HEART. Of COURAGE. 
I will not fear. 

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Dressy McDresserson

Fancy wedding to attend. Sparkles required. Right?
Cramazing Betsey Johnson coat
Yes, this jacket is five million years old. It is a leopard print with this snakeskinish texture. I LOVES IT. 

I know the headband doesn't match, but isn't that coat awesome?
Headband by my amazingly talented other bestie. Go buy her stuff here. Now. I am partial to her tunics. I traded her for one she was wearing this summer and practically live in it. 

Me trying to get the shoes in the shot

Giving up

Corners Hate My Toes (and Go Look at Stars)

Or I do...I broke a toe a few months ago. It hurt like...well it hurt a really lot and I am pretty sure I said some very very bad words when it happened. Apparently I am utterly graceless.
Et voila:

LAST NIGHT:post-Milo bathtime. I stub my toe on this hideous wicker mini-trunk in my bedroom. Collapse onto bed cursing. (it was the s-word this time not the f-word. I consider that improvement)
Said 'ow ow ow' about six million times. Go downstairs to get Milo's Tigger ice pack. Come back up, still in discomfort. Give in to Milo's demands for the Tigger ice pack he has previously hated; so that Milo can pretend that HIS foot hurts. 

I am not generally a shy person. Generally I have no problem talking with strangers if I have to. I mean to say that I am mostly the type of person to strike up a convo with a cab driver, but not the person next to me on the bus. 
So, I read Mrs. Katy's blog here. I think she's great. I admire her immensely. A recent post of hers involved her parents, both very artistic people. I for some reason felt like sending Mr. Knudsen a message of gratitude. And to give him a shout-out for the five people that read this blog. 
Please go look at Katy's dad (Kurt Knudsen)'s Etsy shop here. I pretty much want every single thing there. I really enjoy his crooked style. 

I am pretty sure that right now my toe is NOT broken, and that my son is in his bed completely nude. He decided last night that his new footie pajamas were hurting him. When I checked on his last night, he had totally removed his pjs and was fast asleep. 
I hear , 'yeahyeayaaayaaaa' faintly through our shared wall. This usually means he is diaper-less.  I really hope he hasn't peed. 

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Welcome to My Randomness

I have a fancy wedding to attend the Saturday after Thanksgiving. 
This excites me and makes me incredibly nervous for a number of reasons. 
Excites: ahi tuna lollipops as passed hors d-oveures*. Seeing my old FIFCO friends. Seeing a girl I truly do love marry a guy that mimes adding machine in the air while he talks about adding machines (he's funny). Having a fancy date night with my husband whom I love. Potentially dancing my ass off. 
Incredibly NERVOUS: This will be Milo's first overnight away from home (terrifying for me, really). I do not have a dress. 
    and the tangent begins. 

First of all, the fact that my first worry is immediately followed by my second pisses me off. But we will get to that in a second. This event is one that calls for sequins. A not-long sequined dress that costs no more than $30. And does not require me to wear supportive undergarments. And is maybe not completely black. I saw one at the TJ Maxx in Mundelein this past weekend. Milo approved. But on that day I had pushed my dear darling's limits, and he lost his shit well before we made it to cashwrap. I may very well make the drive back out there today to get it. (no, it was not at the store near my house). This dress totes set the bar. If I get it, I'll post photo. Bah. 
I have really been struggling with something for the past few whatevers. It may have to do with PMS, it may be God working within me to remove sin. Regardless of WHAT it is; know that this is no plea for sympathy or bijh-bijh-ing. I get the feeling this is a test, and I want to be up for it. 
I am a terribly selfish person. TERRIBLY. The thought of my selfishness truly makes my stomach turn. I keep score. I am constantly asking, 'Whens gon be MAH TIME??'
It sucks. 
It really feels like there is a devil on my shoulder. His claws dig into the tendony flesh and I feel warm sticky drops of blood drip down my front. They pool in my armpit and soak into my bra. 
His breath is hot and smells of burnt meat. He whispers things into my ear. Things I never want to hear again in my life. 
I feel really sinful. More so than when I actually WAS a lot more sinful. Heh. 
So this is helping:
'Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord, and that he may send the Christ, who has been appointed for you...'
Acts 3:19-20 (NIV)

Yep. I'll close with that. Have a great day, gnomies. 
*I spelled this right on the first try, but I can never remember the first 'r' in surprised. GO figure. 

Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Pretty Much On

Like Donkey Kong. Last night that is. 

oooo before you get thinking I blog dirty....oh nonononoo...

I a REALLY good salesperson sometimes. 

I enjoy my job (the one that pays me in money, not kisses). I like to think I do not suck at it. 

But in retail, when you turn a return into a sale (twice!)...then you KNOW you don't suck. 

So I bragged about this to my assistant manager, with whom I closed last night and totes just wanna hug.
I bragged about this to my husband, whom I love madly and also wanna 'hug'. 

And now I am Bragahontas on the intertubes. 

I BET YOU that God will find some way to re-introduce humility into my life today.
Hah. Iiiiiii'm...going to go work on bible study. Hah. Really. 

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Doing Fun Things Is Fun!!!

my handsome husb
We've been busy little beavers over here at Casa De Smith here. Or so it could seem. 
I messed with the settings on my camera without understanding what I was doing in the LEAST, so when we attended a suprise birthday party for Brian's dad, the photos looked kinda trippy. 
Et voila:
2 Mr. Smiths

There were more but they all kind of sucked. I have since restored all settings to my camera and am trying to find a free online photography tutorials for morons. 
Milo's recent favorite thing is asking me to take photos of the cats. He sometimes poses with them. Its pretty hilarious. 
Et voila:
I mean, really.
He prefers to direct rather than star solo. 
We also celebrated my father's birthday. Two grandfathers' birthdays within a week of each other, what are the odds?
My dad, Milo, my lovely sister MEgan, and Emilie's arm.
We had a really good time that day. I rarely get time to spend with my sissypoohs and this was nice. 
Milo fell in love with Emilie:

On Columbus (BOO) Day , Mr. Smith had the day off, so we went to Goebberts' Pumpkin Farm and had lots of fun.

He liked feeding the animals. 
Add caption
This was mine. A, I think. Really beautiful coloring and very fast. Quite magnificent. 

These little goats kept fighting/playing. The sound that their heads made was kind of sickening; although I knew their little goaty brains were protected and that this was very likely an incredibly educational and bonding experience for them. 
Sorry about the goathole. Just don't look over there. DON'T!!!!!!!
 This sheep tried to make out with me. 
Milo and I fed a $3 cup of carrots to a giraffe. I've never been that close to one before. They have tongues that kind of feel like a cat's.
This was the pumpkin-eating dinosaur. It would bend down, look around menacingly and blow smoke at the kids standing around. 
Then it would pick up a pumpkin, squash it then drop it. Then it would belch. That always got a laugh from the crowd.
Pig Races!!
That's it for now. I'd like to add that during the all-day process of getting this written and posted, here is what happened:
We went to TJ Maxx, Valli Produce and Party City. 
We came home and made Halloween decorations. 
I almost finished one load of laundry. 
I wrote but did not address or mail yet some overdue correspondence. 
I edited and organized the hallway closet. 
We played Milo Shoots Mommy's Eyes Closed and Mommy Fakes Death. 
Milo ate some lunch, got messy and got into the tub. 
Milo used an entire gift box full of Lush bath bombs, and an entire bubble bar. What a jerk. 
Then I dressed him. He smelled wonderful. I was kinda pissed. He gave me a really big hug and kiss. What a sweetheart.
Milo went downstairs. He smashed a banana into his (formerly clean) face with one hand while gripping the business end of a red marker with the other (thus coloring his entire palm red). 
I read him two stories before naptime. Then I slammed my left ring finger in Milo's door just as I was leaving the room. 
It fucking really fucking hurt a really really fucking lot. I said a lot of bad words. All that I could think of, actually. I feel like a cartoon right now. 

Friday, October 8, 2010

I Took a Test This Morning

Not a pregnancy test, hah hah. 
The Jung Typology test. 
I enjoy classification.

Here are my results. Maybe now it will all make sense. 

moderately expressed extravert
distinctively expressed intuitive personality
distinctively expressed feeling personality
moderately expressed perceiving personality

Famous people that share this are: Mark Twain, Steven Spielberg, Betty Friedan (American feminist), Judy Garland

Mind Body Connection, and TANGENT TIME!!!

First off, let it be said that I feel like a Hebrew slave. That was meant as a joke, not any sort of religious or racial bashing. Haha, get it...there's a Pharaoh...and then there's me...oh weeehooohahahaaa. 
Right then. 

I've been stupidly too exhausted to work out for the past 2 weeks. It shames me to admit this. Inherent laziness is a part of me; I fight it constantly. 
I cannot avoid the connection between that and the fact that I feel like ass. Achy. Tired. Bloated. Out of touch. 

That being said; and me having been up now since 5:34 am, I am going to go do Jillian's Yoga Meltdown. 
Sun salutations make me emotional. You should try it. Do at least 2 in a row, quickly. Good stuff. That and the Warrior pose will help me feel like a well-working machine again. God didn't give us all these damn muscles to sit around. 

Tangent Time!!!
Although I suppose this entire blog is a tangent in one way or another. 
So, I admit this: I watch the Real Housewives shows. When I can, which is usually the day of the finale, when Bravo reruns the entire season. 
Last night I got to see the RH of D.C. finale (which is NOT to be confused with the REUNION SHOW, which is totes NOT the same), and it was PRETTY GOOD!
I really like Cat-she's got the balls I wish I had. The Salahis or WHOEVER THE fuck THEY ARE ...are like the weirdest people ever. That woman is a robot. 

One last thing: Lush has fragrances. Perfumes. Fragrances...?Perfumes. Perfumes. 
Run, do not walk, to your nearest store and find one for yourself.  I think I found mine, and it is NOT the one I thought. 

Thursday, October 7, 2010


I am quite obviously the lamest person ever. 

I don't know why everyone at school had to band together to let Donna Martin graduate. 

I DO know the obscene gesture that Ross (?) creates for Joey (?), but that's only because a girl at work told me. 

I never once saw an episode of the Smurfs or my Little Pony. 

My sisters and I would sneakily watch The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air when our mom wasn't around. She didn't let us watch it because Will makes fun of Uncle Phil quite cruelly sometimes. 

I have yet to watch Glee. 

I can, however, sing the entire hand-clap chant thing from the movie Big. 

And I pretty much know The Princess Bride verbatim. THIS IS THE BEST PART EVER:

But as I get further and further behind on Mad Men, I can feel my tenuous grip on hip television slipslipslipping away. 

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

This has filled a void in my life that I didn't know existed:

Friday, October 1, 2010

Fingersies and Covetsies

I'm not a very good typist. The office job I held the longest and in which I typed the most had an auto-correct function installed on all the computers. So misspelling things and capitalizing the first letters of some words happened all quite auto-bot-ly. 
I don't think that I held down the shift key and the letter "i" for three years. 
But I was still never a FAST typist.
And with this Bluetooth, fancypants keyboard that is just slightly smaller than the average keyboard I am still not a fast typist. 
Brian says I'm computer illiterate. He also believes that dinosaurs were a hoax. (just kidding on that last part, but he'll get the joke)
But *sigh* maybe I am. But as an oldest child, I MIGHT be kind of a knowitall. But I've reined it in a bit, become more humble. I think. 

On to covetsies.
later, when I have time...I will make a list of some cool shiz that you may not have seen before. 

In the meantime I am trying to get faster at lacing that rag rug together. I vaguely recall blabbing that I'd finish that this year. 
Yeeeeaaaaah I just had to take all the lacing out because the work was crap.
Boo. Have a good day, nerds.